The Adventures of Little John

Little John Conquers the World

I’d like to introduce you to a friend of mine. He also happens to be my brother-in-law (or cousin-in-law, depending on how you look at it).Little John isn’t so little any more, but that’s OK. He’s in his late twenties, and what’s amazing about that is that he wasn’t expected to live to see six months.

John was diagnosed at birth with Cerebral Palsy. Though that has never been officially changed to reflect a more accurate diagnosis, it’s likely that his issues are actually caused by Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, a very new diagnosis at the time of his birth.

My parents-in-law adopted him from my mother-in-law’s sister when he was still just a baby, and because of the continual prognoses of imminent demise, never really expected much of him. John’s a great guy in spite of all he’s been through, and is quite capable of functioning well above what’s always been expected of him. After Mom went to California, John became rather restless roaming the Kentucky farm on which he was raised, and this past year asked if he could come live with us. It’s a little crowded in our little home, but we’re glad he’s here. (Plus he makes great coffee, and is the self-named “coffee bitch” of the house. (I’m beginning to bristle a bit at that appellation, much as other family members have bristled at “Louie da turd”.))

John has been wanting to improve his literacy (and pick up chicks), and to that end he’s started a blog. I’m helping him along, and although he’s only got one post up so far and he’s still working on his “About” page, I’d appreciate it if y’all’d drop by and give him some encouragement.

6 Responses to “The Adventures of Little John”

  1. Loumon Says:

    Hey mon… just wanted to say john has a heart bigger than outdoors, he works hard with direction, takes a good ribbing, is a great freind to sit down to drink a beer, he is a good sport and a horn dog. This man needs the company of a good woman or a cross dressing homo for freindship and maybe companionship.. Very good luck to you my freind!

  2. Lou FCD Says:

    Hey Cuz! Thanks for dropping by.

    He’s pretty special, ain’t he?

  3. Loumon Says:

    yeh, he’s special!

  4. The Wisdom of Little John « Crowded Head, Cozy Bed Says:

    […] John pipes up: “Well just because you got a dick between your legs don’t mean you can’t cry.” […]

  5. Aaron Hooiser Says:

    I think we might be related. Your cousin-in-law looks like my twin in that pic. When I saw that pic at frist I thought somebody posted a pic of me but looked at the back round and the outfit and thats so not me. I should it to my mom and all she could say was OMG. I asked her, “Is there something you want to tell me?” She laughed. Best of luck to your brother-in-law/cousin-in-law.

    From his doppelgänger in Texas!

  6. Lou FCD Says:

    Could be, Aaron. Turns out there were several other children by Little John’s mother that wound up either in foster care or raised by relatives of their respective fathers. (I don’t know the actual details, only that all means of contact has been lost to the family.)


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