Score

corner, by Bukutgirl @ Flickr

Half a tank of gas looking for a red party dress in my size that didn’t look like it belonged on a 75 year old big tittied grandmother in a bad wig:

$20.00

Strapless red satin party dress at Ross, size 8 (eat your hearts out ladies, I’m rubbing it in):

$6.50 – marked down from $59.00

Generous opinions and assistance from Ross’ changing room attendants, cashiers, and stock girls who came to watch me try on several different dresses and help me choose the one that looks best on me:

Free.

The look on the face of the cashier who checked us out and was not in attendance through the fittings and who was about to smack me on the forehead and start speaking in tongues to heal me:

Priceless.

I have to go start shaving now. It’ll probably take all night.

From whence came the art:

That photograph is titled corner, by Bukutgirl.

11 Responses to “Score”

  1. anothersadsong Says:

    I got dibs on that dress when I lose my fat. =] I know have a new goal.

    Which is apparently in progress. =]

    Down to a 14 now. Only 3 more dress sizes to go.

    I love you and I think you’ll look almost as amazing as I will, even if I don’t make jaws drop. =]

  2. Lou FCD Says:

    I have razor burn in both armpits.

    And I missed a spot here and there. I’ll have to go over it again tomorrow. Good thing I started a day early.

    I totally have the hips and ass for that dress though. I might not be willing to give it up.

    Love,
    Dad

  3. Lou FCD Says:

    Oh, and I have freckly legs and arms. I didn’t know that until I shaved the forty pounds of hair off them.

    And I have before, during, and after pics.

    TMI?

  4. Martyne Says:

    You cerainly got a bargain with that strapless number. Size 8! You must have a very long nose now. Do I detect the flavour of a certain Mastercard ad running through this piece?

  5. Boxers Or Briefs? « UDreamOfJanie Says:

    […] So The Boy went and bought The Red Dress yesterday afternoon. That was a good time. Don’t know about The Red Dress yet? […]

  6. Lou FCD Says:

    Wait ’til you see the pics, Martyne.

    I turn myself on.

    😆

  7. Crowded Head, Cozy Bed The Priest, The Queen, and The Road Trip « Says:

    […] of my cousins, and both of my sisters were a little shocked upon seeing me, not having known about The Red Dress. (Janie’s got the full story […]

  8. Martyne Says:

    The pics will probably turn me on, as well as you, you cheeky boy. Is it alright if I sell them to the tabloids? Sherry is so expensive these days.

  9. Martyne Says:

    Forgot to say I was so impressed with your Simpsonized image. Yellow skin, and stubble . What more could a girl ask for.

  10. zach Says:

    Hey I’d like to use the photograph for a slide show on my site. I just started my own event planning company, and with the holidays coming up, I think it would be great!

    unfortunately, I have no money, but I also do photography and would be willing to trade for a high resolution that one might like of mine.

    Zachariah Dorsett.

    please let me know, thanks


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